INFANT: EAR WASH
CD: SSSM 104 
Nuclear Nostril Noodle (Extended Version)
Tandoor Chicken Scooter
Ne Me Quitte Pas (J. Brel)
Taipei Truck Tyres Transform Turds
Hysterical Type Of Gaseous Abdominal Bloating
a saying that goes something along the lines of that if you have (x) amount
of monkeys sat in front of (x) amount of typewriters then they will eventually
come up with the complete works of Shakespeare. Unless of course Mary
Chippenfield is in charge of the monkeys. In which case you end up with
(x) amount of dead monkeys.
Taking a modern slant on this saying, and putting it in context with this
review, you could take 5 monkeys and give then access to a CD writer,
tape machine, microphone and a couple of instruments and this would be
the end result. I’m all for a bit of avant fuckery now and then.
Good for cleansing the soul. Unfortunately "Ear Wash" did absolutely
nothing for me. I found it a tiresome and irritating recording that took
all of my self discipline to stop hitting the off button on my CD deck.
The sounds of some sub simian moron making noises from his mouth coupled
with amateurish attempts at feedback noise / plinky plop music grated
greatly on my nerves. Please God make this abomination stop. Of course
this childish and braindead cacophony may be very much up your street.
If this is the case then you are most certainly welcome to it. You can
have my copy if you so wish. Buy a copy to play at weddings and funerals.
Enjoy the carnage that will follow.
Possibly one of the worst recordings of all time, and that’s saying
something, and this may in fact have been the prime motivation behind
releasing this. Congratulations. You’ve succeeded in your quest.
Pass me a banana Mary. ‘Bubbles’ has another record to make.
Infant] / [SSSM]