3" CDR: Mask Of The Slave Records 004 [2006]
Ltd x 100

Elephant's Funeral
Pantomime, Hypnotism, Knife Throwing
Cut Off Her Arms!
Comforted By Clowns

Gelsomina is a Finnish, predominately noise artist. Not only that but Pekka PT, main musician of Gelsomina, also runs the Musically Incorrect Records label. A musician and entrepreneur can never be taken for granted. Once more, a regular event that's becoming increasingly frustrating, I have never heard any of his previous work. Maybe this was meant to be. I thought that having subjected myself to the aural delights of "DeProgramming Pornographers" by Richard Ramirez [read review here], that "things can only get better"... mind you the Labour party in the UK used that as their manifesto song and look how they've fucked up the country. "Things∑... of course... weren't going to get better". Not for this reviewer. Gelsomina saw to that. Gelsomina hammered the final nail in my reviewing coffin. The reviewer has been put to rest indefinitely.You'll all miss me I'm sure.

"Santa Sangre" is another limited release from the Mask of the Slave record label. 100 copies on a 3" CDR with four tracks the release is dedicated / refers to the highly acclaimed film of the same name. I tried watching it once. The film of course. Feel asleep. Far too arty farty for my taste. Didn't watch it again. I feel my life hasn't missed out on anything.

The four tracks by Gelsomina bleed into each other making in essence one track lasting 20 minutes. Although this needs to be split up slightly further. Tracks 'Elephant's Funeral', 'Pantomime, Hypnotism, Knife Throwing' and 'Cut off her arms!' are noise through and through. These three tracks are a feedback and drone drenched electronic nightmare that sits on an almost equal footing with the Richard Ramirez release. I sat. I listened. I put a pillow over my ears. I listened again and grabbed another pillow. Even then the sheer ferocity of the recording managed to find its way through my man made barrier. There was no stopping it. I closed my eyes and willed it to go away. No chance. Even though Pekka lured me out of hiding with a couple of quieter electronic and voice passages I knew his plan. There was no escape. Trapped and ensnared all I could do was sit it out and pray for the best. The maelstrom ended after 15 minutes. The damage inflicted I would never fully recover from. With my head fit to explode and still stinging he played his trump card. Track four 'Comforted by Clowns' was a sub 5 minutes of voice and vocal manipulation. The sort of sounds that schizophrenics claim to hear before butchering their nearest and dearest or random members of the public. A descent into lunacy beckoned. I couldn't take any more. I threw in the towel and vowed never to review any further noise releases. The reviewer has now left the building.

The noise addicts and freaks will have a ball with "Santa Sangre" - I'm sure of that. They'll revel in the intensity of the wall of sound and to the sound of their own eardrums bursting. Hope they have decent medical insurance - because by fuck they'll need it. Mask of the Slave record label don't do things by half. If they say a release is a noise fest then they mean it's a noise fest. Of that you can be sure. And because of this they will most certainly sell out this release quickly. If I wasn't now getting to that stage in my life where extreme noise music isn't the be all and end all, then I to would have revelled in this cacophony. As it is the sadness I feel for not appreciating "Santa Sangre" fuller says more about me that it does about the music released by Gelsomina. Let the young Turks rule the world. This dinosaur is nearing extinction.


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